Bad stuff does happen sometimes. Always remember that, but remember that you have to move foward, somehow. You just pick your head up and stare at something beautiful like the sky, or
the ocean, and you move the hell foward.
Dear Baby,
It’s
hard to think of you as anything other than Max’s sibling right now. I know you
are only as big as a pea, and so fragile that I worry. You are the ‘something
beautiful’ I am looking toward. Even only knowing you for a short 6 weeks Daddy
and I love you and want to keep you. As the weeks progress that love will get
bigger and bigger. Especially as you grow big and strong, and make your
presence seen and felt in my tummy. Maybe you’ll love daddy so much you won’t
be shy like your brother was; he always stopped kicking the second daddy looked
at or put his hand on my belly. Such a trickster. We are pinning our new hopes
and dreams on you little one. Will you stay.. or will you leave early.. Will
you be a little ballerina, a daddy’s girl, a princess, or will you be a soccer
star, mama’s boy, and rough and tumble. I feel you as a girl, but we can’t know
for weeks. You know, Max knows, but your parents have to wait a while longer.
Grow strong, grow safe, and stay. You
are loved. You are needed. We have already gone through so much and think it is
time for us to be parents of an earth baby. Every time you make mommy feel
queasy or exhausted I have cherished. It means you are here and you are
growing. Keep it up love, see you in January.
Love, love, love,
Mom
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